Our drive to the hospital and back went great this morning. I think the patch helped Melanie to not get car sick. They drew some blood and we waited in a room for 40 minutes for the results. Everything looked good for now, which meant no transfusion today. That was a plus!
Melanie was still down today. On the way to the hospital she started crying, because she is just sick of being sick. I thought she was good, but later that afternoon, she hit an emotional wall. She cried for 2 1/2 hours. She was sick of all of it, she wanted to go home, she wants to be with Kaden and be his mom. I think the reality of everything just hit hard. It was so tough to watch her crying like that and not be able to do anything but try to console her the best I could. I called and spoke with one of her PA and my mom, trying to figure out what to do. I know she has had so much medication, and I was wondering if any of them can cause depression. We actually talked to Dr. Ash, and she said Melanie had a small window, if we felt she really needed to go to Logan for a couple of days. However, the risk for complications would go up. My mom just didn't feel it was the best idea. Mel and my mom spoke for a bit, and I think Mel realized that she probably just needed to stay until all her counts were up to stay (her white blood cells and nutrephils will start going down in the next few days). Greg and Steve gave her a blessing and she seemed a bit better tonight, but still a little down. She did not sleep much last night or today, so I'm sure part of it was just exhaustion. I really can't imagine what she is going through. I told her she had every right and need to have a break down and let it all out. I hope tomorrow is a better day.
Extra prayers, please!!
Melanie was still down today. On the way to the hospital she started crying, because she is just sick of being sick. I thought she was good, but later that afternoon, she hit an emotional wall. She cried for 2 1/2 hours. She was sick of all of it, she wanted to go home, she wants to be with Kaden and be his mom. I think the reality of everything just hit hard. It was so tough to watch her crying like that and not be able to do anything but try to console her the best I could. I called and spoke with one of her PA and my mom, trying to figure out what to do. I know she has had so much medication, and I was wondering if any of them can cause depression. We actually talked to Dr. Ash, and she said Melanie had a small window, if we felt she really needed to go to Logan for a couple of days. However, the risk for complications would go up. My mom just didn't feel it was the best idea. Mel and my mom spoke for a bit, and I think Mel realized that she probably just needed to stay until all her counts were up to stay (her white blood cells and nutrephils will start going down in the next few days). Greg and Steve gave her a blessing and she seemed a bit better tonight, but still a little down. She did not sleep much last night or today, so I'm sure part of it was just exhaustion. I really can't imagine what she is going through. I told her she had every right and need to have a break down and let it all out. I hope tomorrow is a better day.
Extra prayers, please!!
8 comments:
Melanie, I'm sorry you are having to go through this. I know nothing I say will make it better, but please know how much you are loved, thought of and prayed for. Kaden does need you as his mom, but he needs you to be healthy to be here. Take every precaution to protect yourself. I'll run him down anytime you want. Please let me know if I can bring/send/or drive anyone or anything down to you.
Sweet Mel, my heart aches for you! Even the strongest have a right to cry and break down, it is all a part of the process. You are loved so much! Please don't give up!
Hi Mel,
You're totally entitled to have a good BIG cry now and then! Who wouldn't? Granted . . . it doesn't usually make anything much better -- we just get puffy eyes, runny noses, and moderate dehydration from so many tears, but it happens. By now, I'm betting you're getting a grip and looking on the bright side.
And to Angie: Bless your heart -- for all you're doing and for being strong and upbeat for Mel. It has to be so hard right now. Know that our constant prayers are with all of you! Love, Kerren
I love Melanie! I hate so much to see you have to go through this. Please know it is okay to cry and get it out. I can not imagine all you must be feeling. Hang in there! I love and admire your strength! I hope today brings a better day for you my dear sister! I love you!
Kim
Hang in there Mel, you can do it! Love ya! ::hugs:: ♥
I have had some really low times where everything in the world seemed to be fighting against me. Although our paths are so different and our experiences not the same I wanted to share my favorite quote...
Never give up
No matter what is going on
around you
Never give up.
it is a part of a poem writen by the Dalai Lama, I heard it when I attended some of his lectures when he visited Utah many years ago. He was talking about Hope and how we should never give up Hope. So I always remember it as Never give up Hope.
Anyway there have been times times I swear that simple saying was the only thing that kept me going. Hope is always there to be had I just always have to remind myself :)
~Marlene Mitton
p.s. forgive me if this posts more than once I am not using this too well tonight lol
I'm praying for you every day, Mel!
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